Faith Painfully Crafted

With empty hands I will be carving through
Till my nails are withered and my fingers are bleeding
To draw your face just like it was before it all
To stare at that smile till you come back to life
I will pick up a piece of my shattered heart
To make it yours, to keep you glowing
And from my lungs I will breathe upon you air
To be like god, except less distant and silent

When I was born anew I was made in your shape
But now I’m distorted but you just simply can’t
So I’m begging the devil to accept this offer
To give another chance, I’ll sign up this pact
My life for yours
Your fire upon my body
These devils’ scratches
For my brain to die slowly.

What parent wouldn’t do that for their own?
Graveyards were made, meant for the old
And my actions only destroyed your future
My decisions they only demised all of your hopes.

For the God who lives in the Heavens
With all of his promises and all of his bags of lies
I never intended to stop believing
I never meant to beg this much and never see the light
This is the God who’s able to save you
By all of his love, with all of his grace
It’s the same one who can deceive you
But it wouldn’t ever matter, cause he’s still eternal, he’s still divine
And his just justice’s justified
While the snake bites the ankle
Crush his head, no, he won’t, no
And he won’t save seeds from drowning in their fall of drops.

So I will carve your face with my own withered nails and bleeding fingers if i must
I just can’t wait on a God who doesn’t listen, who isn’t fair, who isn’t just
It might not be perfect as the thing he does
You used to have that smile, and you will again, no matter the cost
Take this piece of my shattered heart, small and wasted away
This isn’t enough, but it’s all I got to bring you back again
And from my lungs I will breathe upon you air
Cause I’m the one who still loves you
Yes I’m the one who still cares
And for the ones who think that I’ve lost my faith
And for the ones who think I don’t believe in miracles
I don’t think all of it happens if I just sit and wait
Praying is good, but I need more than words thrown at the sky, I need acts of commitment, I need deeds.

  1. crissybwell says:

    This is so powerful. I can feel each line. Again I can’t imagine what you are feeling and going through but I do believe that prayer helps and God listens. I’ll hold on to faith for us both and your baby. I love you. ❀

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