I woke up this morning
There was no one by my side
And all the fire that was burning
Died out inside my mind
I could stay lying down forever
There’s no reason for me get up
When all of the doors are sealed firmly
It’s seems unreasonable for me to try to force them open.

So my advice for today will be
Don’t dream big dreams unless you want to choke upon them one day
This advisor’s day job is over
I quit all my intentions in making this twisted world a better place.

I moved around the house
It has never been as empty as now
There’s only silence, no sound
No hear of a laughter, life nor joy
And all the people living their lives
Sounds pretty selfishly for me
Cause right now it feels as if I have none
So won’t anybody spare a bit love of love?
I need some support, really.

So my plan for today will be
Stay here and wait for the day to go away slowly
It’s not like I have anything more to attempt
I’ve tried it all, all that is left is to let life take care of me conclusively.

The inferno of this world
Has caught into my own
Now I see with their eyes
I wanna watch it all burn
I’m sick and tired as them
Trying to draw a smile across my face
Give me enough drugs to numb these feelings
It’s the only way I could feel God and all of his grace.

  1. crissybwell says:

    Wow this is very powerful and so so sad. I can understand what you are thinking and feeling, but you want to feel God well he is right there. You don’t need anything for that, just listen in all that silence for Him and His words to reach you. Let the silence allow you to reflect on what you are leaving and what good you are coming too. We can’t change the world thinking that there is no point in living and no point in trying, I would rather live till my last day fighting a losing battle rather than accepting defeat. Sometimes we have to create our own inspiration and drive, but just remember that you aren’t a part of this world. Why not pick up His word and see where that leads you. You know that all is not lost and that you aren’t stuck anywhere, soon enough things will begin to look up. Never lose hope, never lose faith. I am glad that you are writing out your feelings though and not sitting and letting them eat away inside. I love you! โค โค โค

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