Archive for the ‘Fear Poetry’ Category

The Math
(Written on June 5, 2016)

So the sky fell into the dark days
So the road turned into a swerve way
And the mirage of the divine
Turned your beverage back from wine.

Such a perfect picture of disenchantment
When the wolves hide within the sheep
And though now you’re blinded by this excitement
Pray to God this doesn’t drag you in too deep.

If the result doesn’t add up with the numbers
There’s something certainly wrong with the formula
When fire weeps sound like roaring thunder
Then the conic section is an ellipse instead of a hyperbola.

So it was written a long time ago
But we were encouraged to believe so
When the devil talks like a Deity
We tend to turn our faith into absurdity.

Such a deceptive way to be captured
When our wounds become compulsion
And though then we waited on for the rapture
We decided that this was true absolution.

If the result doesn’t add up with the numbers
There’s something certainly wrong with the formula
When fire weeps sound like roaring thunder
Then the conic section is an ellipse instead of a hyperbola.

I’ve heard the voice of the devil
And he sings like the sweetest thing
I’ve seen the deep roots of evil
And they look like the most heavenly beings.

So when the waters rise soon to drown
We still will never learn the line needed to be drawn
For the greatest fear’s being taken for granted
But we again ignored it for the sake of feeling wanted.

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This is the last one for the day…

Mouse Wheel

Without this I’m nothing
I think we were designed to feel like this
Feed on your ego, choke on your pride
Cause right now I only feel dead inside.

Without this I’m nothing
I don’t have another way to let it go
You might’ve found success
You might’ve made it
But I’m still battling to find my spot.

I’m not the master of my art
But a slave to it
For everything that hurts
I scribble it.

Without this I’m nothing
And even with it I feel the same
Maybe it’s time to see a therapist
And play their chasing game.

Without this I’m nothing
I only wish for anyone to relate
And help me feel something
When the times come that I can no longer take.

I’m running on this mouse wheel
Chasing dreams that I’ll never catch
How do you think that makes me feel?
That from this pain I can’t unlatch?

The Narrative

It feels lonely in this empty place of my mind
The ghosts are taking a vacation on the world outside
It’s just me with no other self, no other version
Is this a trap set by them? Are they trying to create a diversion?

The other day I received a message from the land of the living
Those beautiful words gave me a false sense of hope
My heart is convinced that the things to come will be disappointing
Like any suicidal body hanging by the end of its rope.

It’s been week since the last discussion we had about life
You made me enter to that place I hate the most
Jaws semi-open, ears pent up, when you talk of your wife
There’s no expectancy when you’re just a ghost.

I received a phone call the other day; it was a long lost friend
We laughed and smiled and pretended that we were doing okay
How can friendship ever evolved if it doesn’t become trenched?
Over that conversation there are a millions things one could say.

This is the story that has been dictated by the ill-fated mouths
They like to put a little a bit of gore where my body bled
There’s not much hope for Heavens when you’re heading south
They tend to remind about things I try so hard to forget.

Inspired on a friend. Kind of on his perspective too.

Cut Off

It’s written on the walls
In your own hand writing
In your own graphic blood
It’s your very own wiring.

For these lovers to be secretly in love
To make it rain, rain blood from the above
For all the laws we’ve broken in here
And all the vows that were given with fear.

If you cut off the cord
I swear to you, you’ll lose your way back home
If you give in to the absurd
I promise you, they’ll fill up your ass with their ***

It’s written on your face
In your very own staring
In your own curved ways
It’s your very own wiring.

For these lovers to run from the world
To make it there, where a boy could be a girl
For all the lives they’ve taken in here
And all the vows that were given with fear.

If you cut off the cord
I swear to you, you’ll lose your own distinctiveness
If you give in to the norms
I promise you, they’ll force up your lack of straightness.

You think that they’ll understand?
You’ll be surprise about their ever lack of
You’ve drawn these lines across the sand
So be prepared for a war you never asked for.

If you cut off the cord
I swear to you, you’ll lose your very self at once
If you give in to their words
I promise you, over your rotten carcass they’ll dance.

Everything Has Gone Back to Normal

Everything has gone back to normal
And my blood it bleeds red
And how it aches
How it hurts.

Everything has gone back to normal
And my calls are not responded
All in a busy tone
All in a busy tone.

Everything has gone back to normal
And this silence is by my side
Greeting me with open arms
Greeting me again.

Everything has gone back to normal
And I feel like my usual self
So useless, so useless
Yeah…

The white empty space
A wide empty space
Nowhere to escape
I have awoken.

Everything has gone back to normal
The momentary happiness has passed away
Passed away
Passed away.

Everything has gone back to normal
Daydreaming seems so bliss
Like a bad joke
I don’t want to.

The wide empty space
Here in my chest
Here in my head
I was never completed.

Everything…
Has gone back…
To normal…
Sigh… The End…?

Uphold Chance

Breaking the cold sweat
Cause it’s the only way to cut addiction
And it’s been so sweet
Until the after image paints suffusion.

Try not to rely on your anger
Try to not be self-disappointed
When you hear the voices yelling at you
“Be very afraid, you will hurt once more”

To be given such a way out
As the opportunities comes flying in
Curved are all the routes
But learn how to truly straight them.

Try not to rely on your suffering
Try not to be so fucking negative
When the evidence is clearly telling you
“All that you fear will be soon to come.”

I cannot go on this road all alone
I’m not warrior I thought I was
So I’m giving up my armor and my gun
Because this is no longer my cause
So help me fight the different war
Cause the one I was fighting is lost
Help me move forward, help me restart
Cause I know now that my life is the cost.

The bird that sung on that day
In the morning of that summer
You tend to make me feel okay
When I feel like I’m being a bummer
And you stand all of my bullshit
When I try to choke this love out
Cause loyalty’s what we want to keep
Is this what this quest is all about?

You make me feel safe
I break down to the floor
Till I cannot stand anymore
Please, come on, help me
I know that I am broken
Help me stop this bleeding…
As you mend all my faults
Make the hurting come to a halt.

Dissected Conversations

The way you look at me
With those adamant eyes
The way you speak to me
With your tantalizing lies
It makes me follow through
It makes me slip in
Hidden under these scarlet sheets
With secrets, you and me.

Here comes the architecture
Trying to come with new plans
Here comes the heart doctor
Trying to mend all of our wounds.

“What is a girl like me supposed to do?
Am I ignore or to give in the words you spew?
You seem to be smart
And you seem to be courteous
But does that mean I’m supposed to trust you?”

Here comes the rendition
With the sparkles and gleams, in all of its glory
Here comes the absolution
To bring back an end to this part of the story.

A glimpse of my mind
With all of its clouds and storms
A peek on the inside
With all of my doubts and mourns.

“What am I supposed to do with all that you give me?
Am I supposed to care, to say that I love you?
You seem to be transparent
And you seem to be kind
But does that mean I should stay for you one more time?”

This endless circle
Looping the sounds echoing in
All that was once simple
Turns into a complication from within.

Dissected conversations
Why do you have to cut my heart to pieces
In order to understand who I am?
Isn’t the sound of my voice enough evidence
To make notice that I don’t have to pretend
That I have no agenda to hide?