Posts Tagged ‘heart’

‘Cause I don’t want to live without you…

For Every Time I’ve Lost You

Get me out of this misery
Cause I don’t wish to live without you
Cause everywhere that I look
I see the illusion of you.

What to do with the feelings you’re feeling?
When they used to be pure and carefree?
What to do now that the clouds have become grey?
What to do with this hurt that I feel every day?

Get me out of this misery
Cause I don’t wish to live like this anymore
Cause everything that I do
Is to be thinking of you.

Gray clouds gather, raining down on my face
And I don’t know what to do with all this space
Prepare myself to move on or fail in the process
How, when our lives used to be so full of roses?

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This is a picture I drew and painted

Phronemophobic Girl

“Come sit next to me
And tell me a bedtime story
One that helps me sleep, serenely
Spare the gory details
I don’t want it to be scary
You know, some ghosts
They tend to haunt me permanently.

Cause when tomorrow comes
And you walk out that door
Then I’ll be here all alone
Sitting on the floor, waiting by the phone
Cause when I’m left alone
I’m left alone with all my fears
And I try to keep, I try to stay strong
But some of these monsters become real.

So when you arrive from work
Will you be ready to hear me out?
When you come in through that door
Will you be willing to hold me still?

If I tell you all of my feelings
Would you be willing to listen?
If I tell you all how it was
Would you help me deal with them?

Maybe together we’ll find the cause.

I know it’s best not to speak of this at dinner
Or while you’re kicking off your shoes and stretching out
Do you think we could address it, maybe after?
There a few things I wish we could talk about.

Do you think you can? Would you be able?
Or would it be best not to speak about at all?
Would it be good just to keep it under the table?
And like scraps of our lives feed them to the dogs.

If I tell you how I am feeling
Would you be willing to listen?
If I tell you all how it was
Would you help me deal with them?

Maybe together we’ll find the cause.

Cause when I open up
I’m left with these tangling pieces
The shell I wear begins to erupt
And the fear in me increases.

So when you come to bed with me
And start reading me that story
Spare the parts that might seem scary
They might haunt me permanently.

Cause after tomorrow
When you walk out that door
To drive off to your work
I’ll be here all alone
With all these shadowy crippling fears
And though I’m trying to keep strong
Some of these monsters become real.”

How everything is not what it seems, sadly. Wrote this a few weeks ago.

The Color of Your Words

Pink to yellow
Then red to black
And back to blue
And there’s something about you
Might as well take advantage
But not in the way most people think.

All I can see is
You cannot see me
All I can sense is
That I’m invisible
Naked to the eye
Of those who love me
Naked to the eye
Of those I see through.

Pink to yellow
Then red to black
And back to blue
And there’s something about us
Might as well speak it out
But I won’t do for certain reasons still.

All I can see is
You cannot see me
Not in the way
I wish to be seen
Naked to the intention
For those who love me
Naked to the intention
For those I love too.

I’m floating in a space that’s private
In a sky that I’m not allowed
Thinking of reaching to a person
That doesn’t want to be reached
At least not by me
By the world
But not by me
I’m invisible in this imaginary state.

The color of your words
Sometimes I think they glow for me
But just when light hits them
Hallucinating it has something to do with me being here.

In this game of chance, sometimes all you have in your cards is a losing hand. I wrote this a few weeks ago.

Losing Hand

On, and off
It’s like a switch
And I’m not sure
Of how I feel about it.

It’s like a pressing
In my chest
It feels so beautiful
I feel so miserable.

Put a wall in front of it
Put a wall around it
Am I alone in this?
Am I alone in this?

On, and off
It’s like a switch
And I’m not sure
Of what to do with it.

It’s like a pressing
In my chest
It feels so different
I feel so imprudent.

Put a stop to all of it
Put a stop to all in all
I feel alone in this
Am I alone in this?

I don’t know what to make of it
I don’t know how anything like this can be possible
Wake up from a dream to become a nightmare
And realize all of this time I was all alone.

The Dispute

It comes always plunging in
Like a heavy weight crushing
Dragging you down into the deep
Where there’s no peace and no sleep
A room full of fog
With no exit door
And walls painted with anger
Fear, shame and regret
And the imp in your head
It dances impatiently
Stirring the storm intensively
And you’re given two choices
To ball your eyes out
Or give into it completely.

I’m trying to overcome it
I’m trying not to feel this way
It always breaks a piece of us away
The little things we say
Our stupid biggest mistakes
This tainted glass of the way that we feel every day.

We come so far to build this
And now we’re just tearing it away
Like it took nothing of our selves
But it took all that we had.

We comes so far to make this
And now we’re just blowing it away
Like it took no effort from us
But it took all our heart and strength.

A break up poem.

rustedheart

Corroded Heart

This dream is for dreamers who don’t dream anymore
This love is for lovers who don’t want to love anymore
This life is for the living who wishes to escape somehow
And all we have left is the right here, is the right now.

I know, I know I’m trying so damn hard
I know, I know it all goes downward
But if we try, if we try to move forward
Maybe we’ll find, we’ll find a new start.

Can your love heal this corroded heart?
I don’t think love can heal your corroded heart
You’re still living for the wounds, for the scars
You’re still pushing off those broken parts.

This poem is for poets who don’t want to write anymore
These words is for readers who don’t to read anymore
A song for singers who don’t to sing about it anymore
A way to escape what we had but we still want more.

I know, I know we’ve been trying so damn hard
I know, I know it all goes downward
But maybe, maybe if we try to move forward
Then we’ll find what we want to find, a new start.

Can your love heal this corroded heart?
I don’t think love can heal your corroded heart
You’re still living for the wounds, for the scars
You’re still pushing on those broken parts.

I think your steel dug deep into the nerve
And crossed off where our names we’re carved
And now going back sounds so damn absurd
I don’t want to go back, go back to the start.

This is based on youth’s romance. It’s being presented from a young woman’s point of view. I got inspired in the way of addressing and expressing these words, from the female friends I had in the past, back when I was in college. Now that I’m older I understand how passionate people can be about their emotions and the way they feel about someone.

flirting_c-410x293

The Flirtatious Kind

My eyes and my heart have been on a quest for someone like you
First it all attracts the sight, then the heart falls in love with its nearby host
And with you, my sweet dear friend, I hope that into lovers we will evolve.

I fear the change that might come by having you in my life
I’m concern about the feelings that might emerge by loving you like this
But your magnetic engine; my heart jump starts, attracted to you.

And when I hear your voice calling on my name
Is like mellifluous tune being whispered to my ears.

My eyes and my heart’s heavy beats desperately searches for you
Call me clingy, an addict, a stalker, but all that I need right now is you;
For your arms to hold me tight, warming me up, all wrapped around me.

I want to be yours, anywhere, anytime, for all that there is.

I thirst for the moment for us to be alone
I crave for the instant that we’ll find ourselves in private
I’ll immerse you in all the burning restless passion that I’ve held inside.

I’ve never been this shy,
Never felt this weak in the knees
And I’ve never been the flirtatious kind, either
But for you I’m wearing this semitransparent top, this easy-to-unhook bra,
And this fast-to-reach skirt,
For you, I’m wearing this perfume, wearing these earrings, wearing these heels,
Wearing this honey flavored lip-gloss for when you finally kiss my lips.

So what are you waiting for?
Won’t you press your lips against my own?
And press your body too, and all of the other parts of you that you can fit into me.

Because this bed is too big and too cold for me;
I need you here to accompany me, to warm me up.
Right here, lying right next to me, like it is supposed to be.