Posts Tagged ‘Life’

Inarticulate Jumble

You never read my words
Unless they’re arrows aiming at your pride
I find it to be pretty absurd
Having to rip your chest like that, out wide.

You feel like saliva in my drink
Sometimes I wish I wouldn’t even touch that cup
Words dig deeper as they sink
You read on my riddles, trying to figure what’s up?

Insults are disguised as praises
Not wise enough to slip it in any other way
Obstacles always come in phases
But this one has stayed since before yesterday.

You never read my words
Unless they’re axes chopping off your head
I find it all straying inwards
When I hurt myself, I make another feel dead.

You feel like smudge on my mirror
Sometimes I hate this face I am wearing in here
Words cannot describe the horror
Can you figure out between lines all of this fear?

I’m the viable vial to poison you
Not deep enough to make through and through
Temptations call upon our names
But I know this one is the one that put us to shame.

I’ll tear your skin and put it over me
As I tore out my heart to make you understand
‘Cause words they cross to make it all unintelligible
Where no reason for reasoning can truly land.

‘Cause my words are inarticulate jumble
That you have no time at all to figure out
I wish that in my pride I was more humble
Yet in your ignorance you won’t know what it’s all about.

‘Cause I don’t want to live without you…

For Every Time I’ve Lost You

Get me out of this misery
Cause I don’t wish to live without you
Cause everywhere that I look
I see the illusion of you.

What to do with the feelings you’re feeling?
When they used to be pure and carefree?
What to do now that the clouds have become grey?
What to do with this hurt that I feel every day?

Get me out of this misery
Cause I don’t wish to live like this anymore
Cause everything that I do
Is to be thinking of you.

Gray clouds gather, raining down on my face
And I don’t know what to do with all this space
Prepare myself to move on or fail in the process
How, when our lives used to be so full of roses?

Severance

And this earthquake will be felt by the people such as I
And when it comes and I won’t be able to see eye to eye
I’ll be bowing my head, while tears roll down my face
‘Cause I’ll be feeling that this chaos I’ve had embraced.

And the fragile mind will stay in shock as they lie in awe
And my hands will tremble, and my heart will surely drop
I’ll be cursing myself, while my fast press against heaven
‘Cause I’ll be feeling that the balance’s unfairly uneven.

And nobody else will truly understand how to reach with my hands
And rip my heart out in order to show the world how much I hurt
And when that time comes my thoughts of suicide might double
‘Cause this while will feel like I’ve wasted it just lying in the dirt.

I can’t find a way to convince myself that it will be alright
‘Cause I know in my heart of hearts that it will bring much more sorrow
And by then I’ll realize that this leading light isn’t as bright
It’s just a veneer to make you believe that there’ll be a better tomorrow.

The Vagrant’s Note

Emotions, sensations
Food for thoughts
Unravels in relations
A dish served best cold

Just a scream within the noise
A girl with a golden crown
In this life you’re given a choice
To carry on or stay down.

You know it all
We know that already
And what shall
Go wrong will do so.

Passive, aggressive
Secretly manipulative
Needy and impulsive
Existence that’s invasive.

This isn’t the response awaited
Not the wings you need
When everything’s incongruent
Best find out its meaning.

You know it all
We know that already
And what shall
Go wrong will do so.

Commentaries Section

I’m in this loop
That seems of reruns
Of my memories
Of what was once
And these feelings
They keep coming over
But it’s been too many seasons
Of the same old-same old
And the viewers have moved on
Cause they’ve gotten bored.

In this script
The writer got sick
Of writing new elements
So everything that’s left
Are fillers to carry on
The length of the time
That things are being noticed
For how long
Will they hold up
Being so monotonous,
So repetitive?

I’ve stopped being brand new and interesting
A long time ago
I’m just a has-been
Of a person that never was.

The Tracking Device

Why do we keep holding on so much onto the past?
Why can’t we walk away from it and leave it behind?
Traces of it keep shoving over my face and down my throat
Stop following me! Teasing me with what I had but that I’ve lost…

You hold onto the sentiments that were once there
But all you find there is pain, shame, and remorse
You swear to yourself that you’ve always been sincere
About the ways you deal with this shit, but you don’t.

I want to move on
But these chains keep chasing me
Strapping me, holding me still
And when I try to kill them, confront them
Mirages of innocence are what I see.

To sacrifice my own to obtain a new freer future?
To put into the fire those who couldn’t get away?
These parts of me are still trapped under the butcher’s thump
Give them back to me! It smiles with a smirk filled with evilness…

You hold onto the things you think are still salvable
Broken, bent and out of shape, they’re not like they were before
You swear to yourself you won’t give yourself like this
You end up being the whore for hope, trying to hold it all together.

I want to let go
But these thoughts keep assaulting me
Strapping me, tying me still
They ask for the ransom, but never kept their part of the deal
These hostages are never released.

And frustration turns into anger
Turns into hurting oneself and those around you
Cause in your mind you think this is unfair
And maybe the whole world has conspired against you.

Pain is the tracking device
That will follow you anywhere
Like a devious, defiant vice
That you just can’t abandon in here.

Cornelia

She came into the room without knocking on the door
Just like she has done a million times before
She came in like flame, burning on the floor
Looking all innocent but we know what she has in store.

Must be cold in here
You’re shaking all over
Dripping from the hair
Too young to be sober.

Porcelain girl, wearing her small doll dress
Silky night gown, she’s being a seductress.

Too fragile for the great fall
When it hits ground, it breaks
Cutting off her flesh, her heart
Blurring in all of her other scars…

She clung onto me like an insect against a flytrap
A startling response, I just couldn’t react
Her arms and legs tight around my body
She’s never liked her father but she’s calling me “daddy”.

Must be hot in here
She’s dropping her robe
Thinking; is it love or fear?
Too young just to cope.

Porcelain girl, feeling awkward in her own skin
Insecurity ingrown, she seems to be hurting.

Too fragile for the great fall
When it hits ground, it breaks
Cutting off her flesh, her heart
Blurring in all of her other scars…

Invisible to the eye
I don’t see you as such
Confusion is such a lie
Coercing you to rush.

Just to give in to the passion
Just to see another’s reaction
She’s in the dangerous position
Where succumbing suffices to the occasion.