Posts Tagged ‘Pain’

I don’t know what the future holds but one thing is for sure I’ll keep on writing. This one is from Amanda White

Archipelago

Category and distance
Those are the rules of being polite
I’ve never met anybody
Quite as honest, as harsh as you.

You shine like a star
You are burning
You’re hot like lava
And I’m melting.

This is building a bridge
To places I’ve never wanted to go in me
I know we wanted to turn our islands
Into a sweet paradise, into a big archipelago.

But you’re ticking on like a time bomb
And I’m the putting up the hours
There’s no switch to turn the senses off
So the sweet is turning sour.

Residues of an apparent lifetime
Like ghosts of an abandoned habitat
We could’ve been so kind
But instead we only brought the bad.

You shined like a star
You were burning
You were hot like lava
Until you melted in.

And the house we were edifying
Didn’t have a strong foundation to withstand it
And now it’s time to close down that door
And in all sadness, leave you right behind it.

Cause you came like a match reaching me
And I’m a jasmine scented fuel tank
And with your fire, I burned and burned good
So now I cannot allow myself to keep on corroding.

So it’s time for our souls to take sail
As our hearts, hopes and dreams to sink
I’m now deciding for our winnings and fails
And you can think whatever you wish to think

But its time…
It’s time to be formal
It’s time to be strangers
Back to gaps and silence bits
Back to feeling somehow unfit.

Time will help me forget about all the wounds
Time will help me forget all about you
Time will only tell if we will remain friends
Or if inside my pain I’ll whisper “screw you.”

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A Motion Cycle’s The Resolution. The order in which the poems should be read. These poems will appear in a poetry e-book I’m writing titled “Fishing for Sirens”.

The Fisherman
The Resolution
The Divine
The Antagonistic
The Needy
Fated for Catastrophe
The Veil
The Logical Sense of the Granted
The Pretender
The Wounded
Aphorismos
Finding Work in Idle Hands
The Executioner
Agean Chain
The Invisible
Elysium

New Amanda White poem.

MMM

Brand new
He promised me I’d be brand new
But how can I be
When since I can remember
They kept unwrapping me
Out for dessert
At lunch, and at dinner
And sometimes at breakfast
While everyone’s still asleep.

Here at the magical center
Where all of my flaws can be eradicated
Let me be hospitalized for awhile
Maybe then the Mister Master Medic
Can heal me from all of my bad feelings
Get rid of all the pain under my skin
And all the way around and inside
Just right where they injected all the bad seeds into my mind.

Used to
I’m so used to all you people looking at
As if it was my fault
Well, then, I can take it
I can take all of the stares
And the whispers
And all the rumors across
Here in my head, my heart
My soul and in my own house.

Here at the magical center
Where all of my bad self can be baptized
Let me go underwater for awhile
Maybe then the Mister Master Medic
Can heal me from all of my night terrors
Get rid of all the ache under my bones
And all the way around and inside
Just right where they injected all the bad seeds into my mind.

One day from a velvet girl
I’ll become a red head woman
One day this strawberry child
Will become ripe on her own merits.

Does it taste different, just a bit stale after a while?
Does the savor changes after being “sampled” for so long?
Oh, lover, how I wish I was in a brand new packaging?
Become the brand with a flavor that you’d enjoy the most.

I haven’t written anything about myself in months. I feel it’s time that I do, so… This is where I left off…

Prison Ward

So I decided to pull the trigger after all
Since I was being cornered against the wall
All the people that were there was no more
Again, it was me against the whole damn world.

Everywhere I turned it was a locked door
And when I asked for help they asked back “what for?”
So the molten lava inside my chest started to boil
And the knives in my back started eating up whole.

I’ve built a prison for my thoughts
‘Cause everyone is either tired or bored of them
And though I’m not as good to speak things as I was
It feels weird to bury them after watching them burn.

So after I went out of the place I was supposed to feel safe
I was back to “I hope you’re happy with what you’ve done” bullshit
That’s another scar on my heart that from now on I’ll wear
This one goes to the hidden chest inside my chest that I’ll keep, I swear.

I always hold onto the wound, or so you will say
You better start thinking of running away like you tried that day
Once more, I helped myself, when no one was there for me
On my black list, I scratched your name, ‘cause you no longer exist.

I’ve built a prison for my feelings
‘Cause everyone is either offended by or unaware of them
And though I’m not as good to speak things as I was then
It feels weird to bite my tongue as I witness my insides turn.

I’m my own prison ward
And you’re not welcome here
You can talk with the representative
But never again to the real living being.

The prisoner inside myself
Will never forget what you’ve done
I hope you’re happy with it has happened
A doppelgänger is wearing my skin and living in our home.

A poem I’ve written under the name “Lauren Black”

Voling Thermo

How subtle this gathering
How lovely this family is
With their eyes locked at
With their lies sealed in
Open lips smacking
When chatting and dining
How so cultural
See how we keep on pretending.

Glory to the queen
And her servants
Here comes the princess
I’m not up for the crown.

How inspiring this welcoming
How faultless everything is
With their mouth murmuring
About outspoken chattering
Bright faces smiling
When inquiring and indicting
Such professionalism
On how we keep on dissembling.

Glory to her majesty
And one of her heir
Here comes the parade
I’m not up for the charade.

I may be never be your favorite daughter
Under secrets and false pretenses attempts
Oh how you’ve become such an exemplary mother
To the neighbors, my sister and both’s friends
But to me you will always be a symbol
One that I could never dare to interrogate
Excuse me for being so upfront and so bold
For I cannot excuse the things you allegate.

So…
Glory to her illustriousness
May the children of her children
Follow on her footsteps
Cause I…
I’m not up for the pretense.

Excuse me for being so upfront and so bold
For I cannot excuse the things you allegate.
Sorry for not trusting the pretexts I’ve been told
For I can never truly depend while you dissimulate.

More poems/songs by “Ryan Lyandree”

Aphorismos

Principles of men are in the line
For the one person abled to sign
Resentment disguised as eloquence
Millions of billions of tons of torrents.

Ghoulish shrieks attempting to be voiced
Rather strident but left with no other choice

Apply fire and brimstone to give meaning
Innate behavior of the human condition
Consume and dispose of what’s remnant
Deface the essence of every conviction.

In the “City of God”
“If you run, the beast catches you
If you stay, the beast eats you”
So…

“Damned if you don’t
Damned if you do.”

Particles, the bosons are solidifying
High energy, large mass adjoining
Electrons, protons and neutrons
Orbiting symmetrically around the nucleus.

Black holes devouring darkness and stars
Fragments of God escaping whizzes and wizards

Apply logic and substance to display implications
Solely to simplify our ingrate presumptions
Feeding on our hypothesized lustful connotations
Ignoring the injurious, devastating ramifications.

After the Big Bang
“Out of chaos the universe was born”
“Temperature and pressure became hydrogen and helium”
So…

“Hang from the branches”
“Sleep with the fishes.”

Axiom
Maxim
Axiom
Maxim
It sounds like acts of pseudepigraphy.

Apply fire and brimstone to give meaning
Apply logic and substance to display implications…

“Hang from the branches”
“Sleep with the fishes.”
“Hang from the branches”
“Sleep with the fishes.”
“Damned if you don’t
Damned if you do.”
“Damned if you don’t
Damned if you do.”
“Damned!!!
If you don’t!
Damned!!!
If you do!!!.”
Only to die wondering
“Who holds the truth?”

Another poem/song by “Ryan Lyandree”

The Wounded

Obsessed
Obsessed with it all
With the destruction
And the restoration.

Fixated my eyes and my thoughts
And my heart on the malice
And the harmony and the grudge
And the ever lack of redemption
Through the darkness
Through the hollow, the gap
The cul-de-sac
All the way back to the beginning.

Questioning my own reasoning
My endless naivetés
The absorption of my compassion
The extinction of my own self.

And through the wounded
I find myself
I find the hatred for myself
I find the stupidity, and simplicity
Of how a human being
Sabotages itself
Dismantles itself
And tries to redeem itself
By giving the love
That it doesn’t feel for itself
To others
And all this
Till the point it cannot no longer
Forgive itself
No matter what.

Not at all
Not one bit
Over and over again
The guilt takes over.

Obsessed
Obsessed with it all
With the oblivion
And the instauration.

Fixated my eyes and my thoughts
And my heart on the umbrage
And the tranquility and the ire
And the ever lack of atonement
Through the shadows
Through the idle, the void
The dead end
All the way back to the beginning.

And through the wounded
I’ve found myself
I find the love for myself
I find the stupidity, and simplicity
Of being a human being.