Archive for the ‘Angry Poetry’ Category

A very personal poem


A Voice Starting To Grow a Face

The words from your voice
Became the voice in my mind
And I kept feeding it and feeding it
Until it became the only thing I could hear

You put these monsters on front
I was the one who turned them into demons
You offered me disappointed in myself
I was the one who signed the pact and agreed on it.

Now that you’re gone
I keep having these thoughts as my masters
I feel whatever they want me to feel
And live by their law that I’ll always be worthless.

As I kept fighting your lies
Deep inside I started believing they were true
And now when I look at the mirror
I can only see the rejection, disgust and judgment.

‘Cause as you said; “this world is threatening”
“be careful who you trust in this life”
“they will break your heart and you will be nothing”
“you can only count in yourself and no one else”
I began realizing that this voice is starting to grow a face.

And with your indifference and lack of love
I learned that you were special as you screamed “You are not!”
I’m here to break the pattern, to undo the loop
This hierarchy of madness and violence stops right here.

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Ryan Lyandree

Shroud of the Veil

I’m not gonna cry
For I am stronger than this
I’m only gonna fight
Whatever is pressing me in, suppressing me
I better hold tight,
Dizzy and down on both knees
My face won’t slump to the ground
I’m mauling my lips with my teeth
With the taste of iron collecting in my mouth
As salty and sour as my restrained tears
I am hurting
Both mentally and physically
Not to mention fucking emotionally…
Like a wounded animal,
(But) I will wield and I will not yelp
And although internally I am bleeding
(No) I won’t beg or ask for your help
I’m keeping the pressure on
You won’t see any seep, you won’t see a drop
But when I get up from here
I swear I’m gonna go for your head
Oh by Thelema and BaalZebub
You better be ready, asshole!
‘Cause I’m gonna go for your fucking throat.

This was a battle
Where I allowed you to give me your best shot
And to shoot first
Foolish of me
I accept I was overconfident
But now that I’m addled
And on my way to almost expire
I stare at my maker’s eye
I swallow this hard pill
For it has come to me, like the veil being shrouded
Revealed to me, by an act of apparent flitting divinity
That with my pain I shall dissolve your ivory tower
With all of my agony I shall bring down your dirt empire

So come on
Come closer to me
You want to be in touch with my soul?
You really want to see the root of my anger?
Come, thy brother
Come see the burden
The secret shall be revealed to you!
Come closer, thy brother
Can you already feel it?
Can you hear any of them?
The whispers turn into screams
The demons tormenting!
Feel my pain!
Feel my agony!
Goddamn it!!!
Why don’t you feel my pain?!
Come and feel my agony!
I shall crush you and I will destroy you!
Even if it’s the last thing I do in my feeble and miserable existence
I will put you in my shoes
I will drag you down with me
And you’ll feel how’s to be crawling like a ravished and trampled snake.

Then you will have what you really wanted
And then I will have what I really needed
An equivalent exchange of the suffering
We shall both be the losers but as long as you’re not winning
I shall always be grateful
I shall always be one with my shadow.

Stream of Voices

I don’t exist
Or exist way too much to be in the way
When silence attacks violently
The voices of those who abused me start chattering.

So bring the guns forward
I’ve been meaning to die for awhile now
Oh, no I do not mean to be ungrateful
But fuck the way I feel about everything when I’m lonely.

Good for you if you don’t speak about these things up front
But for fuck’s sake I’m trying to exorcise my own demons
Can you lend me a hand of getting out of this hell?
Or are you gonna stay on that side, yelling “you can make it!”?

This feeling is fueled by the fact I am physically alone
I don’t want to hear the things I already know
That demonic voice of my own, my low self-esteem
How nobody ever wanted me. How low can I go?

To play the victim and feel sorry about myself
Be in my fucking skin and tell me that everything is ok
“If you’re gonna end it, you should’ve ended it by now”
What kind of fucked up thing is that to say to someone who’s hurting?

Alexander Silver

Forlorn

Electric sheep are dancing in my head
As I’m trying to find a way up ahead
‘Cause what they sell here is overpriced
And people here are the kind I despise.

One step forward and two steps back
As I’m trying to find a way to relax
‘Cause what they say I cannot tolerate
My heart slows down and then accelerates.

Time will only tell why I’m still hanging from this rope
Time will only tell why I couldn’t find ways to cope
Time will heal all wounds or is that just what they say?
Cause my skin is itchy and the infection won’t go away.

I’m knocking desperately at your door
But you don’t seem to care to answer
I’ll bring the whole place down before
This self-rejection becomes an anchor.

There’s an animal farm up on the hill
Where livestock are ran through the mill
‘Cause the sense I give them taste so sour
And they don’t charge by the job but by the hour.

One step forward and two steps back
As I’m trying to defend from these attacks
‘Cause what they imply incarcerates
All trace of proof to dispose and incinerate.

Yes, it all seems forlorn
Especially in the ways you said you’d be here
We were like this since we were born
But I guess you choose, to rather die of utter fear.

Here I find myself banging my head against the wall
Waiting for a miracle to happen or for it to begin to fall
My heart slows down and then it suddenly accelerates
I cannot believe they can destroy it all but not create.

The Voice of the Devil

Grab on this corpse
And put it back in
Oh, how much have I long
For the day I welcome the misery
Back into my arms
Back into my soul
No, I will not understand
Yes, I will be cold
Push aside in despite
Of all the good I’ve done
Oh what a passage of rite
So callous to the bone
Chew it and spit it out
The taste have grown stale
As I scream and I shout
And watch this ship go to sail.

This storm, oh holy diabolical confusion
The intrusion of the so called friends
For now you’ll enjoy the division
But all your angels will soon become fiends
Every mistake back at you
I will be happy when the death touches
The one thing leading you through
I wanna see it lie in the dirt with the roaches.

Oh, happiness
Am I the only one grieving?
Seem like you’re smiling
Is it so fruitful what you’re conceiving?
This knife on my back
I will one day take it out
And I will draw a track
To disfigure your surmount.

You all come in packages
I was thrown down here
And all the dark influences
Will strike as your biggest fear
Come on, the one you will hate
Come on, the one that will not tolerate
Self-destruction with you tied to me
Cause if I go down, you’ll go down with me.

A Motion Cycle’s The Resolution. The order in which the poems should be read. These poems will appear in a poetry e-book I’m writing titled “Fishing for Sirens”.

The Fisherman
The Resolution
The Divine
The Antagonistic
The Needy
Fated for Catastrophe
The Veil
The Logical Sense of the Granted
The Pretender
The Wounded
Aphorismos
Finding Work in Idle Hands
The Executioner
Agean Chain
The Invisible
Elysium

Potential Ryan Lyandree Poem. Still not sure.

Causality

So the bill has been signed
It’s the law, and you have to abide to it
Either you like or not
It is necessary for those who watch over majorities’ well-being
But when you’re a minnow
In this shark infested pool
Well, you better swallow up your pride and feed off your saliva.

This is necessary
For the sake our economy
Dispose of a few unknown second hand creatures
Off to the grinder, more grub for the gluttons.

Endearing offer, indeed…
Just a causal casualty…

No need to be concerned
We will rise up against, down on the streets
Signs and gasmasks at hand
Until another fire signal starts, shifts our attention from the objective
The news will all cover it
This has lost priority
Above all, to everyone, the new diversion plan’s working perfectly.

Such lack of majesty
Always under veil
Million dollar campaign for the malnourished crowd
Makes us shed off our eyes, but not off our wallets.

Profound and prolific, yes sir…
Just a casual casualty…

The woke-up-twenty-second-reflection-army is not doing much
As they eat of their caviar and drink on their champagne.

Show of hands if you agree
Down with all of this politically correct bullshit
Nobody wishes to die of cold or starvation
Everyone prays to rise above.

No fingers to point at
No one to blame at all
It’s just necessary evil
Simply collateral damage…

Just a causal casualty…